How many engineers does it take?

Question: How many engineers does it take to open a bottle of wine without conventional cork screw technology?

The answer is revealed at the end of this post.

This past week I went in to my former employer, Holzworth Instrumentation, and spent a couple days wrapping up a design for production.  This coming week, I will build up some circuit boards and have them ready for shipping to customers.  Being an independent consultant is interesting.  On Wednesday, I was managed by a doggy, shown below.

Guinness (the doggy) sat next to my desk to make sure I stayed on task.  I think he wanted to help me... eat my lunch.

For several years now, I have had a large air compressor that I picked up from Costco.  It comes in handy for cleaning dirt of off bike frames, bike chains, and bike brakes.  It is also useful for annoying dogs and neighbors, and scaring the beejeebees out of me when I forget to turn it off when I'm done cleaning bikes and then it kicks on while I'm asleep.

Recently, my compressor has fallen victim to insidious and treacherous squirrel-saboteurs.  They chewed through the hose that runs to the tool/sprayer which made it difficult to do any useful bike cleaning without having the motor running continuously (loud and very annoying).  I cut out the chewed section and mended the hose with a barbed fitting and a pair of hose clamps.  After completing the fix (pictured below), though, I discovered two more chewed spots near the other end of the hose.

A squirrel-bit hose is easy to repair, but at $3.50 per fix can quickly become more expensive than a new hose.

Since the parts for fixing a section of hose cost about $3.50, a hose with two or more damaged spots is better replaced than fixed (from a cost of materials standpoint).  So, I headed over to Home Depot and picked up a handful of compressor accessory hardware to ensure that the treacherous squirrels will no longer be a problem.

A picture of my upgraded compressor hook-up is shown below.  I installed a small ball valve after the pressure regulator, and then installed a quick release socket into the ball valve.  Now, after using the compressor to clean bike parts, I can close the valve, disconnect the hose, and bring the hose inside where it is safe from the meddlesome squirrels. 

The valve and quick release fitting make my new hose safe from squirrel sabotage.

The other night, I went to open a bottle of wine and realized I do not possess a conventional cork screw (or other wine bottle opening device).  Luckily, I do possess a box of 2.5" deck screws, several screw drivers, and a set of vise grips.  With those tools, one can easily open a bottle of wine, shown below.

A few items from my tool box proved an effective substitute for a conventional cork screw.

Answer: I can do it myself, with a deck screw, screw driver, and vise grips.